AnNaLiA-Nd

I knew the second year of my baby is the most challenging year. It’s not just for me but also for my baby Kei who uses all her sense to gain new experience and understanding her new real world with the less help from me. Her docter has warned me that I should open my eyes widely during the day and night. She will be able doing things that I’ve never thought she can do it.

Ok…it means that all those abilities that she got, prove me her independency.

Well there were times when Kei & I were so distress. 3 times felt from bed..it’s ok. Only caused her crying for 5 minutes. Climb the stairs & felt down like 10 steps…she was fine. She cried for 10 minutes & did the climb again and again. Climb her high chair & slipped on the floor…she just looked shock then smiled again after a minute. Run on the road & slipped … well that was a real pain, bleeding on mouth & made her lips like Angelina Jolie (kesian benerr)…but…felt from dining chair…with her face on the floor. Ugh.. I don’t want to imagine it one more time. What did she get? Swollen on her eyes, like I could see an egg of quail. That was what I called injury… it was like a punched on her face & one punched on my tummy..

Oh..boy…hope nothing worse will be happened !!

I’m getting busier..more and more the past few years then I got overly busy with everything, I just kind of let go of friendship with my childhood friends ( do you think teenage is childhood?

I think it’s a big mistake. I realized I miss the healing process I’ve always had from them. Sometimes I need to have an unpressured space in which I can do whatever I want to do & talk the way "girl talks".

My old friends know that I am this person not that person. They keep me on the ground & put me in other world at the same time. They tell me the truth without even hurting me. That’s a time when "you’re acting crazy!" statement can be acceptable for me. It was like slapping my face while I’m hysteric, but it’s Ok. Maybe they told me the hard things from a beautiful heart. I know that they’re not gonna hurt me anyway.

Well..it’s just about time…I’m gonna meet you one day.

Baru sekarang deh kerasa enak nya pergi sama anak kecil bernama Keiona yang udh bisa tantrum. Kayaknya dia tau banget Mom & Papi nya bakal give up dengan "aksi" nya itu. Hiks hiks..

Being not able to leave her alone at home or anywhere (emang ada gitu yg mo dititipin? hehe), I have to carry my little Kei anywhere I go. She understand very well that there’s a lot of excitement outside the house even only 5 minutes walking to the rubbish bin. There’s no days without hearing her from asking in a good manner to screaming in unbelievable behavior in order to get her out of the "sweet home". ck ck ck…. Nih tampang BT kalo ga maen

The great shopping moment that I used to have now turn in to the tricky time. Going to a park or play ground is must before we go. Unless we’ll hopeless seeing & handling her crying, screaming or even kicking and rolling (malu deh gue!); then she will need a little (only a little loh) bit rest & nap after consuming her energy & never ending desire to play. AT this moment I’ll have to be in rush going one place to antoher places looking what I want to look (apa sih? ada aja gituh!)

Ini nih kalo Kei in action !!

Ops…don’t get bored of this topic…I know that mealtime is sometime like a battle for us. Me; as experiencing the first child, deals the same problem like all my new mommy friends (terutama Inga deh ya…yang baru aja pusing hehe…apalagi si Fitri, komplenan nya anaknya makan mulu…)

Keiona, in the early age was such a good eater. She’d never refused eating everything, from banana, papaya, rusk, carrots, oatmeal, everything. I was so happy & thought … "yes…that’s not my problem, my baby is great in food!" But..as she’s getting bigger, she begins to be a picky. Ooo….. I tried so many things to feed her. Sometimes it worked, but there were time that didn’t work. Well here are what I learn when teaching my baby Kei eating habits.

1. Always feed her on her meal chair (high chair). She will understand that sitting on her high chair means having her meal. Now, she’ll give me a sign by avoiding her chair when she’s not hungry.

2. Don’t rush her. Some says that mealtime is a bonding experience. I put down my cellphone and do a conversation with my baby (looking her eyes). This is not a multitask time. I hope she doesn’t think it’s just spooning meal into her mouth. If it’s really tough, I turn on her fave TV channel (biar bisa sambil nyengir2).

3. I don’t give Kei her toys but I let her hold a spoon instead. Now, she looks so proud dipping it into the food herself. She learn to like carrots & brocolli. After she had her 1st Bday, I put some sugar & salt on her food. Just to give a taste.

4. I set the regular mealtimes which is 3 times in a day. I don’t really stick to the same time but the most important things is she has breakfast, lunch & dinner. I hope she’ll get used to mindful eating rather that munching on the move.

5. Eventhough she has tooth (11 bo!), she sometimes like to eat the very soft food. So I’ll give her what she want. (kayak mommy nya aja, kadang2 pengen bubur ayam, kadang2 pengen sate padang hehehe)

Finally.. I must say that those are not always working with my baby Kei. The doctor said to me to stop worrying that I’m underfeeding her. Just pay attention to her signal. If she turns her head away from the spoon she’s probably really full. Babies are great calorie regulators, they don’t eat the same amount at every meal. They doesn’t grow everyday. (itu kata pak dokter loh yah).

Satu lagi…gendut gak berarti sehat loh!!

Opss…It’s like a million years since the last time I wrote on my blog. Well…being left by my mother after 5 months of her stayed here is like a roller coaster ride for me. I have to change all the daily routine activities, as well as for baby Kei. What can I say? My mother was such a big helper for me and such a true friend for Kei. Starting my day in the morning when I can’t even see the sun yet and close the book of the day late at night, never give me a chance to see the website thoroughly.

Episode after another episode was consuming my whole energy. First, the winter holiday, then "the coming home" of my  mother, then the sick of Keiona….(lama yah kompleinan nya)…

Now is just a time to talk about Kei. Setelah berhasil survive dari sakit yang 2 minggu itu (lama ajaaaah) ternyata Kei is back with the new Kei (loh kok?) Before her late 15 months check, here are what she has brought to me :

1. talk more few words selaen bye,mami, No, gak..(kalo mo tidur bilang "bobo"; mo makan bilang "aem"; mo minum susu bilang "cucu"; lebih sering manggil "Papi" isntead of mommy melulu; bisa bilang "go" kalo papi ke ktr; bisa bilang "ga" utk tiga & "ti" utk three; "om" utk bapak2; "kakak" buat anak2 kecil seumuran dia; "baby" buat bayi; "zes" utk Yes; "Ya" utk Iya; "yuuk" kalo ngajak keluar..kaya tante Indy Barend aja deh…; "Up" kalo keatas…aduh apa lagi yah? sampe lupa..cerewet abisss…pusing deh

2. Fast walking (istilah laen buat jalan ngebut) hehe…

3. Belajar loncat2..

4. Betah memakai hair pin alias jepit rambut

5. Bisa makan sendiri either pake tangan & sendok; plus memilih jenis makanan nya sendiri….duh gaya….

6. Gigi udah ada 11, makanya udah doyan apple…alias "Apo" kalo kata Kei

Kayaknya segitu aja yg bisa diinget…selaen itu…nanti deh kalo ada waktu yah….

I watched my baby Kei this morning… I thought everything about her. I thought that she’s the cutest baby in the world, I thought she has the most irresistible eyes that I’ve ever seen, I thought what is she going to be? Is she going to be a smart girl, a sweet daughter, a tough woman? Will she be nice, will she be pretty, will she have a beautiful heart & mind?

Then I met a bunch of mothers in the park. I looked in their eyes, watching their loved kids running around. It seems like it was the proudest time ever of their life. I could see that they put a lot of hopes on their little ones. I could hear their million of wishes sent to Heaven.

I am thinking, now… that every mother will always think that their children are the most…the most intelligent, the most lovely, the most attractive, and any hundred things you can name it easily. So what’s wrong with that?

I don’t know! I’m just so worried about the expectation, the hopes, the wishes that my baby has to take. Will it hurt her? Is this a kind of love? Or this is a part of my ego blowing up since I think I’m the one who raise her and take care of her? Hmm.. could this be a love? Is this too much for her?

They might be right saying "too much love will hurt".

Well, Keiona… I can’t promise you that I won’t love you too much or even expect something beyond your limit. But I will keep in my mind that it will be my biggest failure to fail you.

The last time I took Kei to the doctor was on October. As she got her "everything shots" & "12 months check", what I remember are DTap, HiB, PCV, MMR, Varicella (kayaknya yah:)), the docter asked me to encourage Kei stop drinking from bottle.

Ugh..Hah..Gleg…what?? Kidding me!! No way!! My God, that’s the most extremely effective way to calm her in anyway….hikhiks! Having been traveled on the long journey when she was still very young, I tried so many things to keep her quiet, calm & comfort. She didn’t like pacifier that much, so I gave her the bottle. Well, This is part of my fault, I think. But I still have no idea what to offer when she gets cranky in the car, at shopping mall or at night ???

Please help me…. Is it possible that Kei will not be using the bottle as she turns 15 months old ??

5 Dec 2006

Enrique Iglesias ada di Houston untuk "a little concert" di Verizon Wireless Theater, downtown Houston. Iklan nya udah sebulan lalu di-denger bolak balik di radio. I didn’t wanna miss him this time. Soalnya ditungguin di Jakarta gak dateng-dateng…hiks…

Anyway, the concert was "ok", well the "great" is too much I think! Emm…sorry ya Enrique…. His singing performance was quite good actually.. Kurang lebih ada 12-an lagu yang di-nyanyi-in, tapi sebagian lagu nya dari spanish version album, jadi gue ga ngerti ! hik hik.. Stage nya juga ga besar & tdk terlalu meriah. Paling cuma big screen as a background, yg warna-warni. Lighting nya juga standard, tapi cukup lah buat nge"shoot" dia. Sayangnya, ga ada big screen yg khusus shoot Mr.Enrique…jadi karna lupa bawa binocular & ga dapet posisi berdiri dkt stage, duh…tetep aja berasa kurang deket ngeliat tampang nya Enrique…hik hiks lagi!

Ok..enuff for the bad things…Hal laen yg bisa diceritain pasti yg bagus-bagus dong ah! Enrique in reality is as cool as on TV or mags. Being a latin-european-american man, he’s such a passionate one! He has both feet on the ground and seems grateful for everything he has. He looked so humble. Dengan kemeja biru & jeans belel plus sepatu biasa, udah cukup bikin perempuan2 tereak2 kegirangan hehe.. Dia komunikatif bgt sama audience & berkali2 took a picture of him by the fans cameras. ABG2 nekad yg ditarik kanan kiri sama security pun, dia selametin….duh seneng beneerrrr! Ugh…He was showing his sensitive soul…ehm…

1 jam 30 menit kurang lebih konser nya selesai. Setelah Not in Love, the way u Touch me, One Night Stand, Escape, & beberapa lagu yg habla espanola itu…pasti semua nunggu akhir dari konser…apalagi kalo bukan untuk …" I can be you hero baby
I can kiss away the pain, I will stand by you forever
You can take my breath away…."

Though he sometimes looked hard to reach few notes, his stage performance was fantastic. He may not have strong voice but he’s so talented in creating a music. I’m sure many women can’t "escape" from him.

Selesei lah Enrique di panggung malem itu….entertaining & enjoyable performance on a cold night

Now, I’m sitting on my desk, watching my baby Kei taking her nap. Fuih..this is the best free moment of the day in my daylife. I’ll have like 1 - 2 hours doing everything I wanna do since there’ll be no chance for me for the rest of the day doing unproductive things (or it can be very productive?) like this. Well, it usually ends up by thinking silly things or even great things. It could always be 2 sides, a bad thing or good thing. It’s all my choice.

Yes this is my choice or a choice that was offered to me. I would say it was a willy-nilly situation. Ops..Now I’m becoming a unwise person by saying that word.

Being a full time Mom is a job that I had never thought. Unfortunately I’ve never prepared myself for this job. This is the most honorable job in the universe. I was so scared, worry, unsure about staying at home, raising a child & working with the art of home management. I used to think about losing identity, having no interesting soul and becoming an unvaluable person. I was so depressed and whining all the time.

It’s so ashamed that society looks down to a woman who doesn’t have a career outside the house. It may sounds so old fashioned, but what’s wrong with that? One day I woke up and started thinking about the new concept. Nothing is wrong if the entire family is so demanding. I stepped out and I’m trying to go deeper and deeper into motherhood life.

I’m thinking the future…. I’ll be sitting on a rocking chair watching my masterpiece that I put a lot of effort in my past times. Then I don’t think I have to be a great woman, I just have to be a happy Mom.

Keiona, is 1 year old last week. I can’t still believe that. I used to think that saying a word "year old" for my baby Kei was million years ahead. I didn’t realize when the day was coming. I had been so busy with things and things and things

Time goes too fast and my baby Kei grows so fast. The expression on her face and every little things she does just remind me of a person I’ve known very well for years. She just looks like myself more everyday.

She knows how to say "bye" when someone is about to leave her…she understand how to drag me to the place she wanna go….she even loves dancing already…she choose her own fave TV’s show…she picks a book of which she wanna read…and on the top of those funny things, she knows how to kick me out of the bed!!

As a mommy will give even her life and soul for her baby, I have no doubt to do everything for my little baby. I pray each and everyminutes to Him that He will guide my baby in each paths she may take, hoping she won’t choose the wrong one and though she may make a mistake, she will come over that….I wish she will be the happiest person ever….now and then….